They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
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