Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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