if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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