WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
