these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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