Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
