He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
sex in a hospital.. check
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
