Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
