I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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