doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
