when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
