Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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