I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i was born a porn star she said
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
