He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
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