ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
