is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
