so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Randomize
