it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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