its not stalking. its research.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
