I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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