The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize