Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
