Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
my god I love twenty year old dicks
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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