i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
