Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
