so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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