look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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