What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
not ubering you a puppy
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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