oh god the rape fog is back!
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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