ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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