I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Randomize
