I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
