may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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