MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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