he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
It's shark week go big or go home
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
