Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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