he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
