Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
they're like a gay fantastic four
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
