After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
