But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
