yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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