Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Randomize
