I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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