So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
