it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
