Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
