id be glad to
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
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