I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
