let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
It's rum buckets o'clock
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
