hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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